Those of you who take 15 min to poop. What is going on in there?

I have chronic constipation I can take over an hour there was a point in my life where I didn't want to live but today I'm managing to live with it.
 
For me, it's something to do with both lactose intolerance and lack of a gallbladder.

I often have what I have dubbed Constarrhea.

It's when you're struggling to poop for 10 minutes and then you have 5 minutes of straight liquid napalm.
 
I wipe until the paper comes back clean, at a not-too-hasty tempo.

A bit of planning what to do after I get out of there too, and a bit of daydreaming too I guess (You know how you can get stuck in the shower for way longer than you thought you were in there? Same applies to daydreaming in general I guess).
 
I don't care how long it takes you to finish the job.

Just make sure to wash your fucking hands once you are done.

It is disgusting in the US how few men I see wash their hands in public restrooms.
Is this really an issue? I can't imagine using the bathroom and not washing my hands.
 
As someone with Crohn’s disease, people who lollygag in the bathroom is infuriating.

Don’t use it as a break place. You might be actively preventing someone with a health condition.
As someone with Crohn's disease, symptoms vary and sometimes I have to stay in there longer than a normal person would!
 
I have chronic constipation I can take over an hour there was a point in my life where I didn't want to live but today I'm managing to live with it.
You on medication for it?

Just asking cause when my painkillers constipated me for 17 days, I was put on 2 bisacodyl at night and by the next morning I was shitting. They're amazing for making you shit, lol. Nothing else seemed to work but they were mostly stool softener laxatives
 
Sometimes it's quick, sometimes it takes ages depending on what I've been eating, I guess.

When pooping is slow I tend to offer myself some encouragement, muttering phrases such as 'come on, lets poo' and 'here we go' to myself. Sometimes I'll sing myself a little ditty. A current favourite is 'Here Comes a Poo' to the tune of 'Here Comes The Sun'. Also works for wee.
 
I have irritable bowel syndrome if you must know. Sometimes it’s a quick and clean plop and go, and other times I’m lying on the floor for 10 minutes naked soaked in sweat almost passing out from the agonising pain in my stomach and thinking I might actually die.
 
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